


the weather starts to change

by mcmargentinski713



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Between Seasons/Series, Gen, Heavy Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2017-12-26
Packaged: 2019-02-20 16:42:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13150743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcmargentinski713/pseuds/mcmargentinski713
Summary: Scott speaks at Allison's funeral,Scott cries at Allison's funeral,Scott has a panic attack at Allison's funeral and Stiles has to help him through it.





	the weather starts to change

**Author's Note:**

> I'm going to say sorry for this right now because I realize how rude it is. It's so rude. I'm so sorry. (And by rude I mean you're going to have a lot of feelings and probably hate me for it). So, Merry Christmas! 
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Wolf or it's characters. 
> 
> Fun fact: the title comes from the scene when Scott is holding Allison as she dies because I'm a bitch and like to makes things as rude as possible on Christmas. :D

Christmas music quietly plays in Stiles' jeep as a failed attempt to lighten Lydia's mood as they pull up to the church Mr. Argent rented for the day's events.

 

Scott’s waiting for them at the top of the steps, not a smile to be seen anywhere on the usually cheerful boy.

 

It’s grey and sad, the air cold and the freezing rain burning their skin as they follow Scott to the funeral.

 

“Are you okay?” Stiles asks.

 

Scott responds by walking a bit, sniffling a little.

 

“So, um, I’ve kinda never done this before.” Scott stutters to a room full of people he’s never met. Thank god _,_ he thinks, if this is what losing someone you care about is like, he never wants to do this again.

 

Isaac sits in the back, pulling at the sleeves of his tux jacket that’s a bit too short on his arms with Kira next to him sniffling into her mother’s shoulder.

 

Lydia’s seated on the other side, staring blankly at the ground and Stiles is a seat down, wanting to give her space from the monster that got her best friend killed, but also wanting to be close enough if she needs a shoulder to cry on.

 

“Allison was beautiful. She was the most beautiful, caring woman I’ve come across-- other than my mom, of course.”

 

Melissa cracks a tiny smile in the back behind Lydia, and the rest of the crowd laughs a little.

 

“I was lucky enough to make her smile and laugh, and I’ll never forget the way she lit up every room with it like she was the sun.” he says, looking up every once in a while to find all eyes glistening at his words.

 

He goes on for several more minutes about how great of a person Allison was, and how he’ll never forget the softness of her voice or how she drooled in her sleep. Everyone cracks a few smiles at that, but then the laughter dies with his next words.

 

“Allison dying made me realize something-- life is so short, and you should never regret anything, so these next words are for her.” He looks up at the ceiling and seemingly through it, into heaven.

 

He swallows, thickly, “Allison, if you can hear me, I need you to know something.” Scott’s voice starts to break. “I’m sorry I was too choked up to say it back that night but I’m- I’m telling you now...because- because I love you. You were the first person I ever loved, the person I’ll always love. I- I love you, Allison Argent,” he sobs.

 

His knees almost buckle, but he catches himself on the podium before he falls.

 

Lydia takes his place and says a few words about her late best friend, meanwhile Scott walks out of the ceremony to catch his breath because it feels like he’s having an asthma attack-- only worse.

 

Stiles notices and sneaks out after him.

 

“Scott.”

 

He’s clutching his chest, sliding down the wall, struggling to get air into his lungs.

 

“I-I can’t breathe.”

 

Stiles crouches down to Scott’s level. “Breathe.”

 

He tries. And tries. “I-I can’t!”

 

“Um...think about something else!” Stiles yells.

 

“Like what?”

 

“Anything! Family, friends-” he looks at Scott who’s staring at him with wide eyes. “-- right not friends.” A moment, passes.  “Um, hold your breath.”

 

Scott looks at him like he’s got two heads.

 

“Lydia.”

 

If Scott didn’t feel like the life was being sucked from his chest right now he’d probably cock a brow and nod in response. He stops trying to breathe for a moment, but his lungs are on fire, they need air now and he can’t figure out how holding your breath stops a panic attack so he gasps, trying to get oxygen in his body.

 

“Cup your mouth and nose with your hands,” Stiles instructs him.

 

He sits up on his knees and follows his instructions and tries to breathe. His lungs start to burn a little less with each expansion of his chest.

 

When he finally finds his world isn’t spinning anymore he asks, “How’d you do that?”

 

“It’s basically like breathing into a paper bag.”

 

Scott nods, changing his position again until he finds a more comfortable way to sit. “That was smart.”

 

“I did a bit of reading after my most recent panic attack so…”

 

“Stiles, you’re smart-- don’t undermine yourself like that.”

 

His lips curl up enough to be considered a smile. “Thanks, buddy.”

 

Scott smiles back, reaching out for Stiles’ shoulder and pulling him into a hug.

 

A moment later Stiles pulls back and Scott’s eyes meet his. “You saved my life.” Scott tells him, knowing his friend has spent the last few weeks thinking the worst of himself.

 

“I’m not a hero.” Stiles brushes it off.

 

“Stiles. You. Saved. My Life. That _kind_ of makes you a hero.” Scott smiles.

 

The other boy’s eyes shine with sadness, not believing a word Scott’s saying and it hurts Scott.

 

“You know I don’t think you killed her, right?”

 

Stiles’ lip begins to quiver. “But I did, Scott. I _killed_ her. I killed _Allison_.”

 

“Stiles, that _wasn’t_ you.”

 

“Maybe." he agrees, "but it looked a hell of a lot like me.” His voice shakes.

 

“But it wasn’t _you_.” Scott says firmly, his hands holding Stiles’ face so he can’t look away.

 

Stiles’ adam’s apple bops up and down in his throat and he leans his head into Scott’s shoulder letting out a sob. Scott’s arms fall around his back, holding him tight.

 

Scott cries too, burying his face in Stiles' neck. 

**Author's Note:**

> Listen, I wasn't gonna write anything today, but then I saw an Allison gifset in my tumblr archive and thought how today was Christmas and it made me sad that Allison wouldn't have gotten to have Christmas with the pack, and then I was gonna write a happy Allison fic, but my fingers didn't cooperate with me. They did their own thing and it turned into this. So, again. I'm so sorry and happy holidays!


End file.
